


Worth

by Klicesgirl16



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-21
Updated: 2014-07-21
Packaged: 2018-02-09 21:11:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1997976
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Klicesgirl16/pseuds/Klicesgirl16
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Since Jeff isn't doing a 24 episode season, I feel that everything is rushed - especially the character development. I wanted to delve into Kira's personal struggle a little bit more because I feel that it was only touched upon, rather than properly explored. I thought everyone seemed to get over Allison's death rather quickly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Worth

Kira sat in her room looking at a picture she had snapped on her phone of her and Scott. It was after practice, so Scott wasn't eager for a photo but Malia had snapped it anyway. 'I know it's because he was sweaty and self conscious,' she thought, 'but what if he thinks it's too official? Do *I* think it's too official?'  
Kira went on Facebook and looked at Scott's site. He still hadn't taken down pictures of Allison. 'Maybe it is too soon.'  
'But I want this,' she countered. 'I want Scott and me to work. And he wants this to work. But how can it?' The fact that she was a Kitsune, a spectral fox with lightning abilities and Scott was a werewolf didn't matter to her. Her parents were the only ones to note it. The fact that Scott was a bit of a troublemaker didn't phase her either. She looked out the window and saw her father nailing a new 'For Sale' sign into the post hole already sunk into the lawn. He had reinforced this one with a sheet of thin steel. 'Katana proofing? Really?' Kira thought. That would be her mother's idea.  
She looked through Scott's old photos. "I know I'm being a creep," she mumbled to herself, "but I'm not going to be a rebound girl. And I don't want to have to try to live up to Allison, either." 'I can't be Allison.'  
There were few pictures of her left on Scott's page, but then again Allison's Dad was against it anyway. That was what little she could get from Allison herself when she was...  
When she was still around.  
It was hard to address it, to comprehend it, let alone grapple with understanding it. Kira could see it all around. Signs of her absence. Another darkness. She knew very little about the Nemeton, about what it had done to Stiles. What it had cost Allison, Stiles and Scott when the previous English teacher went rogue and killed over nine people. It had cost Allison her life. It had cost Scott his first love. It had cost Stiles his sanity.   
But everyone looked as if they were recovering, like they had found their light. That they had found ways to start banishing the darkness. Stiles retained his humor. But Allison's absence didn't wane. Empty chairs at school. A pronounced silence in the group concerning certain subjects. There was even an empty seat at the lunch table maintained in a sort of grieving respect for the absent. One. 'Isaac left too,' Kira thought. 'It could be for him.'  
But she knew it wasn't.  
"Okay, so reasons why this relationship is doomed, let me count the ways..."  
One, Kira was going to move. Everything would be uprooted. Long distance relationships wouldn't work, not if Kira moved back to New York. 'And right when it was just about to be something.'  
Two, Allison and Scott were in love. There were enough Nicholas Sparks and John Green books in Kira's room to know that you don't mess around with something like that. It's not something to just throw around and say off the cuff. They were Allison's last words. They had something that Kira and Scott didn't have. Something they might not ever get. Scott watched someone he loved die, in his arms. Felt her life fade away. In a way Scott's darkness didn't fade. His powers were in check, which was good, but the emptiness of losing Allison was still with him.  
'Which brings me to three,' thought Kira. 'Scott could be trying to move on in order to grieve. She hasn't been dead for a year yet and he's already dating someone else. I know they were on their way out with the whole Isaac thing at that blacklight party, but sort of not really. Is it right yet?'  
Kira had given up trying to be Lydia's friend. Lydia was cordial, but cold. Stiles reassured her that Lydia was almost always that way, even to him, but Kira was more put off by it than anyone else was. Lydia kept her distance. She kept her explanations short when Kira asked a question. She purposefully kept any conversation away from herself. Kira was sure that Lydia was doing her absolute hardest not to attach herself to Kira - anymore than it was necessary at least. There had been a few scrapes where they had relied on each other, such as Mexico. Such as finding Stiles when he was possessed with the Nogitsune.  
But she didn't belong with them. Not yet. Her strongest tie was to Scott, and he was tenuous at best. She didn't doubt his feelings, but yet...  
Kira looked again at the picture on her phone. She had had to apply practically every filter she had simultaneously in order to doctor out the horrific flare surrounding herself and from Scott's eyes. But besides that she could make out the two faces. She was beaming, having kissed him only a little while before. She was bursting with pride that the Coach had invited her to play on the lacrosse team, and that was unprecedented in the school's history to have a co-ed lacrosse team. To have a co-ed *anything* team. 'One small step for feminism,' Kira thought proudly.  
But Scott's face was unsure. Beyond the residual flare around the eyes, he looked tentative. His smile was not genuine, but one of the "cheese" smiles you get asked to put on. He looked like he was a little caught off-guard, not given enough time to prepare. 'He wants this,' Kira turned off her phone, not bearing to look at it for any longer, 'but is he ready for it?'  
Kira came across a photo on Lydia's Facebook page through a hyperlink Stiles posted. Her cover photo was everyone together, laughing. They were having a night out at a pizza place. Stiles had sauce all over him, but didn't seem to understand while everyone else smirked. Allison was sitting at Scott's side. Isaac was across the table. Some girl with reddish hair that Kira didn't recognize was also there sitting next to Isaac, and next to her was Lydia. Stiles was in the middle of the frame.  
She knew she shouldn't be jealous, that she had no right to be. But they looked complete. A full group. They were fractured now, disbanded to a degree. She and Malia were like the 'new recruits'. The new guys. Totally green to the situation. Kira had only just discovered her supernatural abilities - 'Thanks Mom,' Kira thought bitterly - and Malia was only beginning to grasp her humanity; the other side of the same coin. They were leagues behind these seasoned veterans. 'Malia seems to not have any trouble though,' Kira thought viciously. 'Stiles seems pretty comfortable with her.' She wanted this for her and Scott, but remembered that Stiles didn't have anyone to let go of first. It was no secret to ANYONE that Stiles was waiting for Lydia to "come around" as her Dad had once put. But Lydia was never his, they were never a thing, and despite a snide look Lydia threw in Malia's direction once or twice she looked as if she was being accepted. Lydia seemed to be mildly amused by Malia's struggles while she only tolerated Kira.  
"What can I offer them?" Kira sat back on her bed looking at her constellation stickers on her ceiling. "What am I worth to them?"  
She turned over and stuck her face in the pillow. "Is it even worth trying, knowing I'm moving away? Do I even deserve it, to get in so easily after all they've suffered? Maybe it would be better just to move away and stop this before anyone gets too hurt."  
But Kira knew she was already hurting.


End file.
